Who's the boss on wedding night ?

[halicat]

A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on
their wedding night. As they were undressing for bed, the husband
who was a big burly man tossed his pants to his bride and said,
"Here, put these on."

She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body. "I
can't wear your pants," she said.

"That's right," said the husband, "and don't you ever forget it.
I'm the man and I wear the pants in this family."

With that she flipped him her panties and said, "Try these on."
He tried them on and found he could only get them on as far as
his kneecaps.

"Heck," he said, "I can't get into your panties!"

She replied, "That's right, and that's the way its going to be
until your attitude changes!"

[enzvoy]

owww!!!! :nono: that hurt

[halicat]

now one for the guys....


Why do women pass less gas than men?

Because women don't keep their mouths shut long enough to build up
pressure!


:rll:

[attyedhall]

funny and true!:rll:

[enzvoy]

that's better:rll:

[Pantera]

now one for the guys....


Why do women pass less gas than men?

Because women don't keep their mouths shut long enough to build up
pressure!


:rll:



LOL...I need to remember that one

[halicat]

I'm degerating here...

What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop?

The older they get the easier they are to pick up.


:eek:

[blackcat]

Does your wife read this stuff? Geeeez, you're dead meat!:rll::rll::rll:

[halicat]

the crowd is going to get ugly on me..:eek2:


What's the difference between women at the ages of
8, 18, 28, 38, 48 & 58?

>8 - You take her to bed and tell her a story....

>18 - You tell her a story then take her to bed...

>28 - You don't need to tell her any story and take her
to bed....

>38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed....

>48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed....

>58 - You stay in bed all day to avoid her story...

[halicat]

Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of
estrogen. To prove their theory, they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and
observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't
drive...

[halicat]

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
departed mother and started back toward his car when
his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at
a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound
intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to
die? Why did you have to die?"

The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't
wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen
before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A
parent?"

The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then
replied, "My wife's first husband."

[Pepe]

U better go cover your nutz Jimbo .......... MissKitty may come and rip 'em out :rll:

[1buddyc]

:rll::rll:

[blackcat]

Good thing she can't get into the men's lounge or he'd already be dead.......:rll::rll::rll:

[JOYRIDE]

Jim you were on a role. :rll:

[halicat]

U better go cover your nutz Jimbo .......... MissKitty may come and rip 'em out :rll:

she can have them when I'm done with them....I'm hoping they will be worn out by then...:-P

don't let her in the mens lounge...:eek:

[MissKitty]

Okay, I'm taking a deep breath !
Now, first of all you're going to get a bunch of
:nono::nono::nono::nono::nono::nono::nono::nono::n ono::nono::nono::nono: for all those jokes (except for the first one :devil)

Thanks for the info about the Men's Lounge - I may have to swipe Pepe's Laptop while he's out sometime :rll: but I sure hope you boys enjoy your little club.
Hali, if I ever get to meet your wife I'll have to fill her in. I'm sure she'll serve your nuts on a platter for dinner afterwards -:rll:

[halicat]

lol...:devil

I don't think she likes sweetbreads....:vomit:

[halicat]

Does your wife read this stuff? Geeeez, you're dead meat!:rll::rll::rll:

nope..

she often asks me whats so funny on the computer....:rll:

I usually say "what ? "....

[lawil]

:rll:keep 'em comin y'all